Posted by: tgonzales | July 30, 2014

Mom Returns Today

DSC_2100One week and three days ago John and I dropped my Mom off at her sister and brother-in-laws house. Jackie has been providing the day time care for our Mom and we needed someone to watch after her until Jackie returned. I knew I would miss her on one hand and then on the other one I was looking forward to having a little break. Aunt Marthie assured me that her and Buell would take very good care of Mom and I had no worries about that. The thing I worried about the most was that Mom would forget me. It was hard for me not to call her every day but as we have learned lately Mom loves to be in her own home and I didn’t want to keep reminding her that we could not be picking her up until Jackie returned from her vacation. When I was young whenever I would go somewhere other than my home I would get homesick. I tried to stay busy and play with my cousins, but at night time it was the worst. I would lay awake and cry myself to sleep. I remember telling my Mom that I was homesick when she would call and talk to me and I remember it was worse when I would hear her voice. When I got home she would hug me and tell me that she had felt the same way when she was younger and knew exactly how I felt. Anyway, my Mom’s last words to me as I kissed her goodbye and as she looked at me with those deep dark brown eyes, she said: “Don’t leave me down here for 11 days!” I bet you know how much that hurt, right? But I had to go to work the next day and every day after that so I knew that she would be in very good hands with her sister. Mom’s sister and her get along very well and have a wonderful time together and the last week was no different. There were moments of confusion and one day she did not remember Aunt Marthie’s house or the kitchen, and asked her when they had moved in there. Some days were spent on the go, but lots of days were spent resting or sleeping, embroidering, rummaging through her suitcase and purse. She also packed her suitcase and put it at the door thinking she was leaving. I received a phone call from Aunt Marthie two days ago saying that she had someone there that wanted to talk to me. I was happy but nervous at the same time to speak to Mom, after all I hadn’t talked to her since the Sunday before last. Of course after the “how are you” was said I told her I missed her and she said she missed me as well and started to cry. Then she asked why I hadn’t called her and when I told her that I didn’t want to make her homesick; she said, “well, I am anyway!” as she continued to cry. That ripped my heart out and I know I’m just being paid back for the many times that I ripped her heart out in the things that I said to her growing up. Mom didn’t know that I had been in contact with Aunt Marthie throughout her stay, with texting and phone calls from Aunt Marthie while Mom was sleeping. Mom will never know how much I missed her the last 10 days, all she should know is that I how much I am looking forward to being with her again holding her hand as she goes through this time in her life. I have rambled on here for way too long and if you are still with me, I want to thank you all for being here. I love you all!


Responses

  1. I hope the reunion will be wonderful and a blessing for you both!
    Hugs!

  2. xoxoxoxoxo…………

  3. The memories you are making now are the ones that will be freshest in your mind for many years to come. Hold her close and let your heart guide you.
    Much love to you and your family,
    Linda

  4. Bless your sweet little heart. So sorry your family is having to go through these tough times. HUGS

  5. Thinking of you xxx

  6. It is so hard to know what to do for the best. Your Mum knows you love her. You are both in my prayers tonight. God bless Mums everywhere

  7. I wish I had words of comfort. I agree with nanacathy, it is so hard to know what is best. Your heart will guide you. I know you and Jackie are so glad to have each other.

  8. Oh Tamara, I’m so sorry you have to go through this tough time with your mom right now. I hope you know that you are doing what is best for her. As others have said, you follow what your heart says. Enjoy the little moments that come along. I have a feeling that hug when you reunite is going to be wonderful. Big hugs from me!

  9. You & Jackie & John & Marthie & Mom are all so AWESOME! You are blessed with such a wonderful family and caring hearts ~ I just want to scoop y’all up and hug you. If I didn’t have the loving family I do, I would choose to be in yours.
    Love & hugs
    LV

  10. :,-( I have no words, dear Tamara…. just tears … and prayers….
    I love you. God will help you (et al) thru these difficult days ahead…..
    XXXOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    Much love, Kat


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